Sex World Records - Men Versus Women Humor - Marriage Relationship Jokes
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Quick Fact: What's the number one quality women look for in a man? Sense of humor, of course!
You found our popular daily sex and romance related Top Ten lists! A virtual
knowledge base and reference to any and every thing you always never needed to know about sex related
issues and behavior!
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Our Now Infamous Top Ten Sex Related Lists!
Top Ten Celebrity Sex Tapes
10. Paris Hilton: Her ex-boyfriend got so pissed off about everyone downloading his uploading that he decided
to capitalize on the craze and sell the damn thing himself, seriously pissing off the hotel magnate's family. Not
like anyone was surprised that this skanky little slut would let herself be videotaped screwing anyway. And can
anyone take another second of her? Even if she IS answering her cell phone mid-shtup? Yawn!
9. Sylvester Stallone in 1970's "The Party at Kitty Stud's": "Aaaaaadrian!" So the studly Rocky star got his start
in B movies... apparently some more X than B!
8. Spalding Gray in 1973's violent rape-incest-themed "roughie" "The Farmer's Daughter: Especially poignant
now that he's no longer among the living, this flick is further evidence of just how edgy the conflicted
monologuist was.
8. Tonya Harding and Jeff Gillooly's "Wedding Night Tape": The fact that she and Jeff generated so much
scandal with their lead pipe incident only made any further scandal that much more delicious. American loves a
bad girl!
7. Rob Lowe's 1988 hotel tapes: Brat Pack golden boy actually exhibits a libido! And - gasp! - genitalia! Frankly,
we think it gave him some much-needed street cred.
6. Simon Rex's gay jerk-off video: Illicit gay vids don't usually generate much interest; they're sex-crazed
homosexuals, after all, right? This one was just too good to let it fall into the file of anonymous wanking gay
boys.
5. "Chuck Berry's Home Movie" in Berry pisses on a woman in a bathtub: Mr. Berry's was "B-ing" very kinky
using his "Johnny" to spray his date. But anyone with a pissing fetish is "Goode" in our book!
4. Bob Crane's numerous sex films: Hey, they made a movie about them, for crissakes! Who'd a thought the
white bread Hogan's Heroes star was such a perv? And gloriously so! This guy made the perfect use of all that
brand, spankin' new videotaping technology and set an example for future generations of voyeurs.
3. Late '70s blaxploitation stars Jayne Kennedy and Leon Isaac Kennedy at play, including the notable fisting
scene: Jayne Kennedy is still a babe, and this underground vid of her taking Leon's limb up her twat only
added to her legendary status.
2. R. Kelly and his underage paramour(s): This raunchy rapper should be doin' time after doin' these teenage
'hos on camera. Maybe next time he won't be so hellbent on seeing himself in action.
1. Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee: This baby flew around the Internet so fast it gave a whole new meaning
to the information superhighway. People who'd never downloaded a damn thing in their lives have this on their
hard drives. The quintessential example of porn for the masses.
Top Ten Signs You're Already Having a Bad Year
10. That "coke" you sniffed at the New Year's party was anthrax.
9. You've already been served a summons relating to that same party.
8. You've already spent 70 hours in a dark room by yourself watching Law & Order reruns on your
Tivo.
7. One word. Raelians.
6. The IRS has already sent Agent Smith from The Matrix to warn you about tax time.
5. You're so bored you've already started buying next year's holiday gifts.
4. Your Christmas tree has already become more flammable than charcoal fluid.
3. Your subscription to Maxim just expired. right before the Christina Aguilera issue.
2. The gun you just put in your mouth was really just a cigarette lighter and it burned your uvula.
1. You've just read your first Top Ten list. and it's not even awards season!
Top Ten Orgasm List:
10. Sex in a boat: oar-gasms.
9. Sex with a nerd: dork-gasms.
8. Sex at the entrance to your house: door-gasms.
7. Sex on carpet or linoleum: floor-gasms.
6. Sex at the supermarket: store-gasms.
5. Sex at a Steven King Movie: horror-gasms.
4. Sex with a prostitute: whore-gasms.
3. Sex with an accountant: bore-gasms.
2. Sex while sleeping: snore-gasms.
1. Sex while broke: poor-gasms.
Top Ten Silly Names for Vagina:
10. Cooter.
9. Bearded clam.
8. Cooch.
7. Fuzzy lap flounder.
6. Muff.
5. Whisker biscuit.
4. Split-faced hair shark.
3. Poontang.
2. Quim.
1. Beaver.
Top Ten Signs You're Not Getting Laid (Enough)
10. You not only strip the label off your bottle of beer, you strip off everyone else's, too.
9. You can't even watch the CSPAN channel without seeing some sexual subtext.
8. Navigating through Moviefone is enough to instigate a healthy round of phone sex.
7. You start to wonder what all of your ex's are up to.
6. Bumpy bus ride = prelude to masturbation.
5. You've just ordered a second ATM card for your favorite stripper.
4. There's a sign that reads, "Vacancy" on your pants.
3. Your new cologne/perfume is Desperation by Calvin Klein.
2. You're masturbating with your other hand to get the feeling of someone new.
1. A bleak, joyless existence has sapped you of your will to live
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